When you cheat on your boyfriend, you are doing it for a reason that you may or may not know. After the infidelity though, you will need to figure out what the next steps on how to proceed.
Your Reason For Cheating
The very first thing that you need to figure out is your reason for cheating on your boyfriend.
- Did you cheat on purpose because you are unhappy with your current relationship?
- Did you accidently cheat with an old fling? Maybe someone new?
- Did you want to feel the thrill and excitement of being “bad?”
Whatever your reason, take a moment to reflect on why you cheated and then write it down. You will be surprised, but if you take the time to write down the reason why you cheated, you will find that it is the real reason why it happened. Maybe you don’t know at the moment, but if you write down your thoughts and how it felt, you will come to realize your true reasons for cheating.
Your Guilt After Cheating
Unfortunately after cheating on your boyfriend, you may feel guilty. Some people don’t feel guilty though since they actually enjoy cheating. Are you one of them? Feeling this way isn’t fun though, and it’s a good idea to figure out how to get past this stage if you are experiencing it. Part of the recovery process is to figure out your reason for cheating. Once you establish why you did it, you can begin to get to the real problem you were trying to fix by cheating.
For example, if you cheated and feel guilty because you haven’t told your boyfriend yet, then you first need to write down your reason for cheating. In this case, let’s say it is because you love your boyfriend, but the sex isn’t that thrilling. So that’s why you cheated you realize. Now, the next step to overcoming any guilty feelings is to start talking with your boyfriend. You know why you cheated, but now you may have to admit cheating on him.
Once you tell him though, you may find that you are relieved to have the truth expressed. This of course, will help to get rid of some guilt.
*NOTE* You will probably still feel guilty after telling, however you will begin the process to NOT feeling guilty and instead to figuring out if you can save your relationship!
Your Trust After Cheating
Relationships don’t always end after cheating. Some people continue to date, get married and have kids and others will completely separate. Either way, you need to know that your trust credibility will be severely damaged. Once you cheat on your boyfriend, that is game over for trust for a long time.
This happens since you broke the unspoken rules of an exclusive relationship: being exclusive.
If this doesn’t sound that great to you, but both you and your boyfriend want to stay together, then you will need to get over this hurdle. Part of that will be being 100% honest with each other once you two are talking again. This is essential to having a healthy relationship after cheating.
So, if you want to pick up from a bad situation, then the next step after admitting your cheated is to be honest!
Your Relationship After Cheating
If you are able to salvage your relationship (assuming this is your goal instead of being with the other guy!), then you have to know you will be cast under suspicion for a very, very long time after the incident. Whether it’s coming home late from work or staying after hours in school to study.
Expect your partner to worry and ask questions about your behavior.
Some things to help alleviate this fear from your boyfriend will be to assure him you are faithful by giving him evidence. If you come home late from work often, then have some way to connect with him at that time so he knows you are actually doing work instead of “working” with someone else.
What To Do After Cheating – Last Words
When you cheat on your boyfriend, you have to figure out what you want. This is the most important thing. If you want the affair to end so you can salvage your relationship, then you need to know your reason for cheating. That’s the very first step and most important way to really know yourself a little bit better. Once you get to know your reasons you can find out the next steps for when you cheat on your boyfriend.